Yet Another Web Comic (YAWC)

A gift of Guitar Hero 2 found its way to my Playstation 2. A mixed blessing, to be sure: I really don`t need another hobby, but its absorbing decadence is so disarming. Let`s say it`s easy not to notice how much time one spends playing (or attempting to play) such “classics” as Trogdor! Instead, I could probably learn to play a real instrument, and play it really well…But instead, I shall strum away on my plastic Les Paul.

Merry Christmas!

Cobras! The Simpsons is such a great show.

I am not very happy with the results for today, but here they are. I haven`t been drawing as much this month as I would like (which is to say, barely enough to get a comic out the door). But with the holiday season, a bit of overtime at work and some other real-life “intrusions”, I simply can`t make drawing a high enough priority right now. Besides, I have it on good authority that I am getting a tablet for Christmas, so I don`t feel motivated to get ahead of myself.

I must say, I do so enjoy the comments on Slashdot. Half the crowd is illiterate (and I don`t mean they misspel the occasional word or have some minor grammatical issues) and half of them think they know far more than they do. The best is when the two groups intersect. Hi-larious. This is not to say I know enough about half of the topics that come up to make a coherent argument, but the flip side of that coin is you don`t see me posting. Slashdot, I don`t read you for the “news”. I read you for the depths of the Internet which you dredge onto your filthy, public fora.

Apparently, the current games only use half of the PS3`s power. I don`t think anyone is surprised that the first games for a console aren`t quite showing the console`s full potential, but here`s a bit of shocking news:

No one will use 100% of the PS3

. Ever.

Was that meant literally? If so, duh — The games would run too slowly in intense parts, and it still wouldn`t use 100% in the slack parts. If it`s figurative, well, sure, it has a lot of potential with firmware updates.

Potentially

, it could be used as

an ignition source.

Potentially.

I didn`t actually try to verify that last one, but we`re just spitballing here. The point is, sure, you`ll probably ALWAYS find another way to make it better. Maybe in a decade it will be able to properly render CSS 3.0. It will probably beat all the PC browsers to that feat, since CSS

turned 10 today

and most browsers still barely get 1.0 right. The point is you can pretty much always update it. Again, even if it`s figurative, it`s still a “duh” statement. Heck, even the Nintendo Entertainment System has a small following, and the old Ataris have even more amateur (and I`m sure, in some cases, professional) engineers tinkering with them.

I am quite underwhelmed.

Though, in Wii news, the

forecast channel

was released today, and we`re getting the Opera browser, for free until March, on Friday. I fear that, with all the excitement, next Monday`s Virtual Console release will be even more underwhelming than usual.

This is, of course, NOT based on a true story…

Speaking of a true story, Microsoft released its XNA Game Studio Express two days ago. I haven`t checked it out myself, as I have enough things going on right now, but it appears to be a neat package for amateur game programmers who want to worry more about gameplay and logic than workign with DirectX to make everything appear. Apparently it will even abstract networking for PCs. Why mention for PCs? Because, apparently, it will allow you to develop, with minor changes in code (or the proper use of compiler directives), for the XBox 360! Now, there are some catches: You have to pay $100 to use your work on your XBox 360, and anyone with whom you want to share it must not only pay the $100 but have a complete copy of your code, or so it seems. Also, no commercial development, and Microsoft gets final say if you want to seriously distribute it (even freeware, as I understand it)

Personally? I think this is great. How else would you get your code onto an XBox 360? Sure, you have to pay for the privelege, but not $10,000, and you don`t have to “prove” you are a “competent” game studio. I use quotes because I find the definitions of these words in this context very flexible, but the point remains the same, and that is that for a small fee you can compile and run your code on your own console with not only the manufacturer`s blessing but their assistance? Yes, there are several homebrew efforts and you can “hack” your PS2/3 to access Linux, but they don`t have a huge developer`s network with tons of sample code which they will provide to you.

That`s $100 well placed if you ask me, and even though I much prefer free to any cost, even a penny, I can`t imagine honestly finding this a bad deal if you wanted to get into your 360`s processing guts with Microsoft`s blessing. No warranties are voided here, friends. You`d have to have some truly dark spectacles to be so blind.

Plus, let`s not forget the PC side…It seems pretty much geared to distribute your finished projects. I don`t know if licensing issues apply here as well, but it will handle everything up to networking. Great place for the amateur code hack who wants to see how their game logic/ideas pan out quickly. Sure, it won`t build optimized code, but coders do have to learn to crawl before they walk, metaphorically speaking. After brief review, these appear to be great tools. And again, the PC side is free.

However, I could be wrong, so I remain skeptical. I`ll wait to see how this pans out for others first. Maybe in a few months I`ll have some disposable income and can drop some cash on it. I`d really like to. Right now, though, I have a Wii and several games in my queue. Plus, the holidays are always busy. I`m not a big fan of C# (Oh, right, you use C#, a compiler for which is available for free as well) but we can learn to get along.

Still no word on the Child`s Play contest.

This will bring an end to this story line. Having had the Wii for almost a week, I`d like to say a few things. The motion-sensing is great, the pointer is well-executed in some games (Twilight Princess) and not in others (it`s so-so in the menu as well), and the channel system is underwhelming. The forecast and news channels are not working, and there`s no indication of when they will come online.

Perhaps a disturbing sign is the Wii Shop channel, where you can buy Virtual Console titles: It`s almost always glacially slow. This is quite surprising, considering how lackluster the launch selections are. It`s not that the games are bad so much as they`re not, in general, what I think of when I think Nintendo or Sega (With the exceptions of Zelda and Sonic). Mario 64? Mario Brothers? What about

Super

Mario Brothers? What about Link to the Past? Super Mario World was great, too. Sega is better represented with Sonic and Golden Axe, but what about Phantasy Star? Shinobi? No, we get Ecco the Dolphin.

It`s not that these games are bad, but they`re just not the all-star lineup I had expected. And, the really disturbing thing is the speed. Updates can take forever as well, as there have already been two, and depending on when you run them they can take anywhere from 5 minutes to 30 minutes, where they promptly stall halfway through the process. Is the Nintendo network this much over capacity, or is this a symptom of the security-enabled wireless network troubles we`ve been hearing about? Either way, it would be quite disappointing if the news and forecast channels were delayed because of network scale issues. I`m wondering if the Virtual Console launch choices weren`t picked for those reasons as well.

The console is great, truly, though it does

have its limits

. I`m afraid that the popularity of the product may have outpaced even Nintendo`s dreams, and as a result they`re going to have to play catch-up with their online component, whether through updates and/or server upgrades and acquisitions. The online component feels like it wasn`t even planned to be active at launch, and it still needs a lot of work.

As an aside, is this 1984, Twilight Princess? What`s up with the only three save slots? This would have been a great application for Miis: Give each Mii a 3 save slot log, so everyone in the family can play and guests can take a swing at it, so to speak. This is pretty much inexcusable, and there is no simple solution. SD cards can work, if you have at least two and you are careful about your saving and deleting. One forum member, of which forum I don`t recall, gave the simple answer to a five-member household: Buy more Wiis. Yes, that`s my solution to the save slot problem. Just throw $250 at it. You know, because I am flush with spare cash and Wiis are as easy to come by as peanuts at your local grocer.

This is probably one of those guys who put his remote through his TV. Moron.

For your edification

(warning, .pdf!)

I`ll have my crack team of physicists check up on all this for me. I must admit I had a good idea of where I wanted to go, and when I tried to execute it realized (1) I don`t remember much physics from what little I had and (2) I never was much good at it in the first place. So, hopefully, nothing was blatantly abused here. I seem to remember that angular momentum is conserved unless a torque is applied, and elliptical motions are even more special cases. Anyway, the point is pretty simple here…

DON`T SWING THE STUPID REMOTE SO HARD!

I guarantee you that the accelerometers aren`t really appreciating all that juiced-up muscle you put behind that last home run, so get off the `roids while you still have your “boys” intact, if you get my drift. You may very well be confusing the poor things, too, causing the game to do unruly and undesired things. Swings that don`t register, register at the wrong time or virtual swings that register even when you didn`t really take a swing are all possible. That, and you`re just asking for all sorts of damage, whether its to yourself or your belongings (or potentially your former friend`s expensive belongings). Don`t worry, the ADXL330 can take up to 10,000

g

s. The remote seems equally sturdy.

Remember that when the opportunity arises to bury one deep inside your doubles partner`s kidneys.